I'm cynical about Christian self-help books. A few authors have kept me from giving up on the genre altogether, but on the whole, the books in Lifeway Christian Bookstores scare me a little. Call me a book snob, but it's hard to find Christian living books that aren't oozing with cheesy comments and cliche quips. See? Told you I was cynical. Enter Linda Dillow's Calm My Anxious Heart. My sister-in-law and mother-in-law had been talking about it for months on the heels of a Bible study they did and I had actually heard of the book several years back. So, for Christmas, my sister-in-law gave me a copy of the book and I took it as an opportunity to disprove some of my cynicism and work on my anxiety issues.
What I discovered was surprising.
While the book still had a few eye-rolling sentences (sorry--the writer in me can't help it), it was also full of deep, theological ideas that overshadowed them. And what I found most surprising--more surprising than the quality of the words--was the fact that this book wasn't about anxiety at all; it was about contentment. Anxiety is just an outward manifestation of discontentment--a connection I had never really made before. Dillow talks about the "diseased" statements that we ask ourselves, which lead to discontentment: "What if?" (anxiety/discontentment about the future) and "If only"(discontentment about the past). Either way, we're missing the present, missing the NOW.
Perhaps the most meaningful lesson I learned (and am learning) is that contentment is desiring to be where God is. Today, God was in me feeling sick and having a damaged bookshelf delivered to my house. These aren't things I would want or pray for, but it's what was; it's what was His will. My prayer has changed more and more from "Let my life be easy (fill in the blank with however I want to do that)"to "Let me be where you are."
It's been transforming, really, but this lesson of contentment is no easy one. I'm still fighting it, still learning to rest, but it's worth the battle, and when you catch a moment of feeling really, genuinely content, there's nothing like it.
3 comments:
Cara - Thanks for such a perfect summary statement of this special book. I got to meet the author recently and thank her for her insights that truly penetrated my "hard and sometimes closed heart". Your blog explains why it touched me so profoundly even tho' I'm not an anxious person. VJ
I couldn't help laughing as I read the first paragraph of this review. I feel the exact same way about Christian literature in general - self help, fiction, nearly everything but the bible. But, the lessons you've uncovered in this book sound like stuff I need to read again and again. Thanks for the rec. :)
I love it when I have a life-changing realization. It's so freeing. Of course, it always means a struggle with the flesh, but that's a good thing. :)
Praying you can hold fast to this truth and that you just keep growing deeper and deeper in contentment in all things.
(I'm currently reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp, which is focusing on true thankfulness. It sounds like our books have some parallels...)
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