Drunk on Nyquil

I have never been drunk in my life, but this morning my body begged to differ. Let me preface the rest of this story by reminding you that I am a lightweight; half a glass of wine and I'm already feeling a little buzz. So, when I took the two mammoth nyquil pills (the recommended dosage) last night for the cold that is making me sound like a man, I should have known that it was a bad idea.

I went to sleep around midnight and didn't wake up until 10 a.m. when my husband woke me up with breakfast in bed (aww). In order to understand how strange these 10 hours of sleep was for me, you must know that I can almost never sleep that long. I wish I could, but years of teaching has taken its toll on my ability to sleep in. Second, you must also know that I am a light sleeper; I wake up at the smallest sound. Five minutes before 10, Phil walked in my room (I ALWAYS wake up when our bedroom door opens because it creaks), and stood by the bed and I didn't move. Nothing. I don't even remember him being in there. So, I started to have an inkling that something was off.

It wasn't until I woke up and started to talk that I realized that something might be off. I had a hard time talking without slurring my words, and I had a hard time thinking of the right words to say at all. Phil had heated up a scone for breakfast and as I gave him a sleepy hug, he said "I love you," and I said, "I love scones. And I love you. Not in that order, though. I mean, I love you more than I love scones." And then a few minutes later, it hit me that I had taken the full dosage of Nyquil last night and it all came together. Of course, I told Phil I had had the full "serving" of Nyquil. Nice.

I don't remember the other funny things I said, but Phil kept on laughing at me and telling me that I was loopy. I had to laugh too. In fact, it's a little dangerous to be typing in this condition, as I have already caught several funny mistakes in editing this entry.

So, the moral of the story is: I need to heed the warning that "marked drowsiness may occur." It applies to me. Maybe I should write the company and ask them to add to the warning label "Discontinue use if your words begin to slur." From now on, I'm quitting Nyquil...or at least only taking half a serving.